My Name is Jimmy & You Better Not Wear It Out

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johnnyfc:

gotdrugs:

I WOULD NEVER SING SOMETHING WITH A TRITE NAME LIKE “ST. JIMMIES” SONG.

I AM ST. JIMMY, A NEFARIOUS, PARTY HAT LOVING DRUG DEALER. I AM NOT AN ICE CREAM TOPPING.

BESIDES, THEY’RE CALLED SPRINKLES, NOT JIMMIES. THAT MAKES IT SOUND LIKE YOU CHOPPED UP A BUNCH OF PEOPLE NAMED JIMMY TO TOP YOUR ICE CREAM WITH.

I’m so very sorry that that was such a traumatizing facebook status for you to look at, bro. but I think you need to calm down.

I WILL NOT CALM DOWN. HOW WOULD YOU LIKE IT IF YOUR SONGS WE’RE CALLED “SCRUFFY, FAILURE AT LIFE IS TOO MUCH OF A PANSY TO ACTUALLY SING A SONG HE WROTE FOR HIS GIRLFRIEND WHILE SHE IS AWAKE SO HE SINGS WHILE SHE IS ASLEEP” OR “IMMATURE, FAILURE AT LIFE CAN’T HOLD DOWN A DESK JOB”

I WOULD NEVER SING SOMETHING WITH A TRITE NAME LIKE “ST. JIMMIES” SONG.

I AM ST. JIMMY, A NEFARIOUS, PARTY HAT LOVING DRUG DEALER. I AM NOT AN ICE CREAM TOPPING.

BESIDES, THEY’RE CALLED SPRINKLES, NOT JIMMIES. THAT MAKES IT SOUND LIKE YOU CHOPPED UP A BUNCH OF PEOPLE NAMED JIMMY TO TOP YOUR ICE CREAM WITH.

(via panda-deactivated1211-deactivat)

johnnyfc:

wait… WHAT. I DON’T WANT TO DIE ON EASTER SUNDAY!

SOMEONE HIDE ME!

I WILL NOT HIDE YOU. I DIED EVERY SINGLE DAY, SOMETIMES MORE THAN ONCE! SO STOP YOUR WHINING AND BE A MAN.

johnnyfc:

J, you were so badass when you were like this.

You were doing meth, weren’t you?

(Source: streakingly)

johnnyfc:

hellaaoakland:

So this is different, you guys.

dang, J, when did you become so effeminate? 

…I just. What. Johnny, what were you on???

(Source: cosetted)

johnnyfc:

gotdrugs:

JOHNNY, I LOVE YOU IN THAT YOU’RE KIND OF THE REASON I EXIST AND YOU CAN BE A DICK BUT WE’RE TIGHT AND HAVE BEEN THROUGH SOME CRAZY SHIT WAY, BUT NOT LIKE…ANY OTHER WAY. I’M SORRY MAN, BUT I DON’T THINK OF YOU THAT WAY.

I HAVE A QUEEN FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!

MAAAN I DON’T LOVE YOU EITHER

PEOPLE ARE SO WEIRD!

GOOD BECAUSE IT WOULD BE REALLY WEIRD IF YOU DID BECAUSE I AM A HAPPILY MARRIED MAN AND YOU KNOW

JOHNNY, I LOVE YOU IN THAT YOU’RE KIND OF THE REASON I EXIST AND YOU CAN BE A DICK BUT WE’RE TIGHT AND HAVE BEEN THROUGH SOME CRAZY SHIT WAY, BUT NOT LIKE…ANY OTHER WAY. I’M SORRY MAN, BUT I DON’T THINK OF YOU THAT WAY.

I HAVE A QUEEN FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!

johnnyfc:

gotdrugs:

johnnyfc:

yeah, I don’t know what it means, either.

I was streaky before you, bitch.

this is very true. what a sassy bitch you were.

I am always a sassy bitch, Johnny. JFC what kind of drugs are you doing now boi that you’re forgetting this fact? Do I have to kick someone’s ass??

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